I’ve been reading about Reality/Choice Theory this week, and I gotta say, fascinating stuff. Of all the applications of theory, I think this one resonates most with me in my forties. That said, I probably would have scoffed at it in my twenties, so there’s always times and place when one looks at just about anything. I’m not sure how to ‘identify my theoretical orientation’ as a counselor with the knowledge that just about everything I once thought, I no longer think, which forces me to realize that in another 10 or 20 years, I’ll be in the same boat, smiling softly at my 43-year-old self and her big thoughts.
But for now, Glasser’s Choice Theory resonates. It’s the idea that we may not be able to control the external events or even our environments, but we can control what happens within us, what we do in response to those events and the choices we make and attitudes we have. This is a theory, in my mind, of personal responsibility, which I ran from in my twenties, stopped to ponder in my thirties and am finally learning to embrace in my forties.
I’ll need to read his actual book, however, before pulling the trigger on loving the theory as a counseling foundation. I’m doing that pronto.
Imagine what I could have done in my twenties if I wasn’t always a victim of something or someone else.
With that in mind, here are two quotes that speak to just this concept, one by Viktor Frankl and the other by Maya Angelou, both of whom I’ve quoted before:
It makes me think, now that I can finally absorb this concept, about the choices I make, the attitude I have and the power I possess over nothing at all except myself.
Even that is tenuous at times.
But as Marcus Aurelius wrote in Mediations:
You have power over your mind - not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.
Kind of makes a girl want to brighten up her outlook, pay attention to her thoughts and let her behaviors represent her hope for the world and belief in herself rather than the go-to mindset all-too-common in modern society - the idea that we’re victims of something beyond our control.
I’ve got to run now because there is sunshine in the sky. After two solid day of rain, I’m off to bask in it.